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Home / Thoughts / Wheeling: it can be hard, but it can be fun

Wheeling: it can be hard, but it can be fun

Written by Sean on Friday, November 24, 2006

I remember vividly an afternoon, in the parking lot where my late wife worked. We were chasing each other, going around in circles, moving swiftly, laughing, full of joy. We were both in wheelchairs, her because she was a para, me, because I wished I was. We were playing some sort of tag, just the two of us, yet we had a gathering of spectators. You see, she was working at the local rehabilitation centre and we were foolling around like "old hands" at wheeling, and the folks still going through rehab just watched us, eyes agog.

Tag! You’re it…

Of course my wife *was* an old hand at wheeling, having been injured 30 years before the events I just described. Me, I had only been wheeling full time for about a year, and as often as possible before that for another 5 or so. When I first spoke to her, she told me that "she could run circles around me" and she could do that then. Alas, her body betrayed her. Too many years in the chair wrecked her upper body. Her fingers, wrists, elbows, shoulders, all shot to smithereens, with arthritis and other unpleasantness. Herniated disks in the neck, to the point of having her doctor suggest surgery and spinal fusion (which my wife adamantly refused). Life as a wheeler was hard for her. Very hard.

In fact, life in general had been horribly hard for her, between an abusive ex-husband (who was driving the day she got hurt in that car wreck), having to start from scratch after escaping from his clutches, a kid addicted to drugs, and other things better left unmentionned.

But she told me, and others who knew her well also told me that my coming in her life rekindled joy. Joy of life in general, but also, opened her eyes to the pleasures one can have because, and not in spite of, wheeling. Obviously, two people in love will generate joy. But that wasn’t just it. There was pleasure in getting a particular move down path. Getting off a steep kerb for example. My wife wasn’t able to do it anymore, but she coached me, and delighted in my enjoying the challenge.

• There’s joy in meeting a challenge posed by the chair, such as finding the shortest, easiest way around an obstacle.
• There’s joy in being able to control and move gracefully and elegantly. And surely one can do that, even in a power wheelchair.
• There’s joy in chasing one another playfully.
• There’s joy in shocking people (like hanging to one another’s wheelchair, zooming down the street, yelling "Freak show".)

So yeah, there are obiously hardships. It’s hard work to wheel yourself, from getting out of bed in the morning to getting back to it at night. But it can also be a lot of fun.

So, consider this: Consider that if you have a physical impairement that forces you to use a wheelchair, it doesn’t *have* to be constant tears and drama. And if you have a friend, family or loved one in a chair, it doesn’t have to be all heartache. Find the joy where you can. It’s there, you only have to dig a bit to find it.

[tags]Wheelchair, Paraplegia, Pleasure, Challenge, Joy[/tags]

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