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Speculations
Written by Alex on Friday, August 4, 2006
A few weeks ago I was talking to a friend who keeps a journal of her life. That’s not unusual lots of people do, right? Yes, only her journal consists of nothing but daily temperatures, the weather and how she felt that day. She thought she suffered from Sunlight Deprivation Disorder (I know that’s not the official name but you know what I mean) and this journal is how she monitors her moods and her life.
This got me thinking. I’m not a person with a whole lot of time on my hands at any time of the year, but in summer life is non-stop from the time I get up at oh-my-God in the morning to get chores done before heat starts setting in (it was 93°F when I left for work this morning at 8:30) until the time I collapse into bed at night from finishing work and chores after the sun sets. In between is work and anything to keep working and escape the heat. In winter there is still the same amount of work and plenty to do but without the heat so chores don’t have to be done so early and late and things to do inside.
I have gone for months without thinking about my feelings of wanting to be disabled, of seeing myself that way. I got my new chair over a month ago and while I haven’t had a lot of time to work with it I haven’t even thought about it except when I need to take it out of the closet to get something in the closet.
After talking with my friend I had a semi-revelation. What if my feelings and moods were affected by seasonal changes? It’s worth some thought. So I thought about it some more and while I’m not 100% sure of it I have recalled that in the past I have had the feelings but not the desire to act on those feelings so much in the summer as in the winter. Is it the heat that makes us get up and get going earlier and then work later? The sunlight? The change in routine? I don’t know but I think I will have to keep my journal pretty much the same as my friend listing the weather and the activities that keep me busy enough that I don’t have time to think about anything else.
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