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Home / Thoughts / Sean's Thoughts / Right or wrong?

Right or wrong?

Written by Sean on Thursday, November 10, 2005

I woke up yesterday morning, feeling somewhat out of sorts, restless. Half way through the day, I realised I was really just waiting to get myself back to bed. Not really wanting to get through that day. Too many things on my mind, really.

Without going into details, boring details, dreary details, between financial situation and relationship situation, things are a little stressful.

Then throw the transabled thing on top, well, might as well sleep throughout my life, because being awake is not all that pleasant an experience.

Watched a show on tv last night, where they were examining what happiness was. They had a guy who went from being a French engineer to being a Zen Buddhist monk, something like 30++ years ago… They discovered all kind of chemical reactions in a happy mind, and the monk was able to turn total joy on or off, at will. He’d trained himself to be happy, you see?

I believe that is possible. I’m not sure it’s possible for everyone. I don’t think that training the slosh that serves as brain cells in my head would make much of a difference.

But on the topic of happiness, I briefly spoke to a gal who is a realised wannabe. Hadn’t spoken to her in eons, and she told me she was having a rough time. I joked and said that she should be happy, she is now a para. She answered that being a para didn’t solve her problems, not by a long shot. She even said she wished she hadn’t done it.

This is interesting, because not very long ago she was telling me how happy she was about it all. Could the rough time in her life right now make her achievement appear in a negative manner? Or is it a genuine feeling that it was the wrong thing to do? Is this negative feeling going to be permanent, or will she come to feel differently again?

I certainly don’t know.

And it’s not something I’ll know unless nor until I become a para myself, if I ever do.

Yeah, perhaps in retrospect I’d be thinking it’s not the right thing, but there really isn’t any way to know. Hindsight is usually 20/20, is it not?