Comments on: Control over BIID and vitriolic response from people http://transabled.org/thoughts/sean-thoughts/control-over-biid-and-vitriolic-response-from-people.htm Talking about Body Integrity Identity Disorder - Just another disability! Wed, 23 May 2012 18:36:56 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.1.1 By: Brice http://transabled.org/thoughts/sean-thoughts/control-over-biid-and-vitriolic-response-from-people.htm/comment-page-1#comment-15568 Brice Mon, 25 Aug 2008 10:59:29 +0000 http://transabled.org/?p=813#comment-15568 Why are people without impairments so threatened by those who have them? The attitudes of others can be more disabling than anything we\'ve got. Why are people without impairments so threatened by those who have them? The attitudes of others can be more disabling than anything we\’ve got.

]]> By: Chloe http://transabled.org/thoughts/sean-thoughts/control-over-biid-and-vitriolic-response-from-people.htm/comment-page-1#comment-15562 Chloe Sun, 24 Aug 2008 14:46:52 +0000 http://transabled.org/?p=813#comment-15562 Miked, I agree with Julia. You have stated things clearly and accurately. I can totally see how someone with a disability might have a self image of being able bodied. Miked, I agree with Julia. You have stated things clearly and accurately. I can totally see how someone with a disability might have a self image of being able bodied.

]]> By: Julia http://transabled.org/thoughts/sean-thoughts/control-over-biid-and-vitriolic-response-from-people.htm/comment-page-1#comment-15560 Julia Sun, 24 Aug 2008 10:24:40 +0000 http://transabled.org/?p=813#comment-15560 well put, miked! well put, miked!

]]> By: miked http://transabled.org/thoughts/sean-thoughts/control-over-biid-and-vitriolic-response-from-people.htm/comment-page-1#comment-15558 miked Sun, 24 Aug 2008 08:44:26 +0000 http://transabled.org/?p=813#comment-15558 My take on BIID is as follows: 1. I don't believe many people choose what they are attracted to, they just are or are not. It's like sweet potatoes - you either like them or not, it has nothing to do with virtue. 2. The biggest problem with BIID is similar to masturbation, the act isn't a problem, it's the guilt and shame we feel before discovering most people do it, and sexual drive is physical, not moral. Most of us learned this as teenagers, but because BIID is not a 'mainstream' issue, it's a harder lesson to learn. 3. If we compare the public perception of BIID (such as it is) to the public perception of homosexuality in the 40's or 50's we can see parallels - Many people thought it was sinful, shameful, disgusting etc. - but it still existed. Today most western societies have come to realize that it's just a fact of life and accept it, but public perception of BIID hasn't matured quite yet. For what it's worth, I don't have BIID, I am really disabled but struggle with the issue because my self-image is not as handicapped, but fully abled. My kids occasionally point out to me that I need to adjust my self-image, however that's harder than it would seem. Telling someone with BIID (either the classic definition or the reverse, such as me) not to feel that way is as silly as telling someone afraid of flying 'don't feel that way'. My take on BIID is as follows:
1. I don’t believe many people choose what they are attracted to, they just are or are not. It’s like sweet potatoes – you either like them or not, it has nothing to do with virtue.
2. The biggest problem with BIID is similar to masturbation, the act isn’t a problem, it’s the guilt and shame we feel before discovering most people do it, and sexual drive is physical, not moral. Most of us learned this as teenagers, but because BIID is not a ‘mainstream’ issue, it’s a harder lesson to learn.
3. If we compare the public perception of BIID (such as it is) to the public perception of homosexuality in the 40′s or 50′s we can see parallels – Many people thought it was sinful, shameful, disgusting etc. – but it still existed. Today most western societies have come to realize that it’s just a fact of life and accept it, but public perception of BIID hasn’t matured quite yet.
For what it’s worth, I don’t have BIID, I am really disabled but struggle with the issue because my self-image is not as handicapped, but fully abled. My kids occasionally point out to me that I need to adjust my self-image, however that’s harder than it would seem. Telling someone with BIID (either the classic definition or the reverse, such as me) not to feel that way is as silly as telling someone afraid of flying ‘don’t feel that way’.

]]> By: Sean http://transabled.org/thoughts/sean-thoughts/control-over-biid-and-vitriolic-response-from-people.htm/comment-page-1#comment-15297 Sean Sat, 09 Aug 2008 21:51:59 +0000 http://transabled.org/?p=813#comment-15297 Gordo, I think you hit it on the nail. They stop listening. I'd never thought of it in those terms, but that has got to be what it is. Some people say that anger is a secondary feeling. That before anger, there's another feeling underneath, usualy fear. One wonders what is it that makes them so afraid of us... Gordo, I think you hit it on the nail. They stop listening. I’d never thought of it in those terms, but that has got to be what it is.

Some people say that anger is a secondary feeling. That before anger, there’s another feeling underneath, usualy fear. One wonders what is it that makes them so afraid of us…

]]> By: Chloe http://transabled.org/thoughts/sean-thoughts/control-over-biid-and-vitriolic-response-from-people.htm/comment-page-1#comment-15294 Chloe Fri, 08 Aug 2008 21:51:42 +0000 http://transabled.org/?p=813#comment-15294 In the original blog we are referred to as "imbeciles". Apparently she has never met any of us. I have the impression we are all trying to deal with this (BIID) as intelligently as we can. I have another mental illness for which I take medication every day. I see a psychotherapist. It boggles the mind that people think we are resistant to such things. We are "whining"? Really? I haven't seen any signs of that. How do people interpret being open and honest about our feelings, thoughts and experiences as whining? You take on the whole world, Sean; and I thank you for it. Please don't do it at the expense of your own well being. My own aspiration is simply to tell my friends about this. My hope is that, should it come up in conversation, they will be able to say "I have a friend with BIID. She's a really nice person and she's handling it really well". O.K., I flatter myself. I'm not always as nice as I'd like to be and I don't always handle it as well as I'd like : ) In the original blog we are referred to as “imbeciles”. Apparently she has never met any of us. I have the impression we are all trying to deal with this (BIID) as intelligently as we can.

I have another mental illness for which I take medication every day. I see a psychotherapist. It boggles the mind that people think we are resistant to such things.

We are “whining”? Really? I haven’t seen any signs of that. How do people interpret being open and honest about our feelings, thoughts and experiences as whining?

You take on the whole world, Sean; and I thank you for it. Please don’t do it at the expense of your own well being.

My own aspiration is simply to tell my friends about this. My hope is that, should it come up in conversation, they will be able to say “I have a friend with BIID. She’s a really nice person and she’s handling it really well”. O.K., I flatter myself. I’m not always as nice as I’d like to be and I don’t always handle it as well as I’d like : )

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