transabled.org

Yea, it’s amazing how we can all do very stupid things sometimes and hurt each other…your right…it’s just happens, and then you regreat it afterwards big time. wish there was a way to turn it off, or wind back the clock to keep it from happening.

I once had a kitty who I dearly dearly loved, she was the closest thing I had in my life for a long while. One day I was using the bathroom getting ready for work, when I went in she was sitting outside the door just like any other day. I closed the door, did my thing…when I opened the door to come out, she learched like a frog at me with her claws drawn and began scratching the hell out of me. I retreated back into the bathroom and closed the door. She tore my hands and legs up with very deep scratchs. For the next three hours a I sat in my small bathroom while she tore at the door, hissing, and sticking her claws under the door trying to continue to attack me. Finally a friend came and we were able to catch her and contain her. As much as it hurt, I felt I had no choice after the circumstance to take her to the animal center and give her to them. I still miss her to this day and still wonder why she snapped the way she did. I’ve never seen something so addiment to attack their owner suddenly, nor something tear at a door so violently either.

-Wheelman

@Wheelman – this happened to a friend’s brother. He loved this cat so much, but the cat went absolutely mad one day. He had to call someone over to catch the cat. The cat had to be euthanized – it broke the guy’s heart – and when they did a necropsy, a brain tumor was found.

Please don’t feel guilty. These sad things happen sometimes.

In a way Sean it is heartening that friends feel close enough to be able to sound off in that way – it shows a security that is absent with a more distant or detached relationship, stressful as conflict is. It’s the ability to resolve or accept your differences that is the true test of friendship.

“I do wish that we could skip all the snipping and biting and just cuddle up and be best buds. :)”

So do I. :) That is not how our society works at times. A friend used to dislike everything about me, so he or she would constantly tell me I needed to “grow.” I was quite happy with a few changes. It was as if I was being told to grow to please the friend to be accepted and liked. A friend should love and care for another 100% or 0%. There should be no in between or pick-and-choose.

Being physically disabled is a blessing. We are the most accepting group of people. Even when we are hurt, we still care about our friends (even from a distance). That’s the basis of Christianity and God’s love.

@Amanda- No offense or anything, but it’s probably not a good idea to bring up religion… Not everyone here is Christian, you know…
(I especially don’t want another argument, even though I pretty much started the first one. Sorry… ><)

I am sorry if my comment offended you, Tora. For those who are Christians, hopefully there will be agreement. :)

Right. Lemme set this straight here and now. It does not matter what your religious beliefs are. If you are Christian and express than in your posts and comments, that’s fine. If you are not Christian, then deal, accept. With the same understanding, if you are Christian and a non-Christian expresses opinions that are not within your beliefs, it’s ok. We are not here to judge one another. As many of you know, I am not religious (although I am spiritual). But I accept that other people have other beliefs.

@Amanda, regarding people with disabilities being the most accepting group of people, I wish that was so in my experience, but I’m regularly surprised at how unnaccepting people with physical disabilities are of people who have mental/emotional conditions. :(

@Amanda. perhaps this friend was trying to help you in ways that you couldn’t see yourself. Friends have ways of seeing things about other people, seeing areas that the other person wants to change but doesn’t know how, and that friend kind of nudges that person along trying to help them. It’s a common thing amoust friends.

Sure, it does go too far when the person tries to insist or push you to a place that you personally don’t want to go, but as a friend, it’s your job to talk to the friend and just say, “I don’t think that’s what I want for my life.” A true friend will understand and will back off and let you live the life that you are happy with. The key issue, just because someone tries to help you in your life doesn’t mean that they hate you or dislike everything about you, it just means that they care about you and want to help you be as happy as you can be and want to be in life.

-Wheelman

Respectfully, Tora, as an administrator of this website I’m going to have to disagree with you. This site has always been a place where people could voice their opinion, even their dissenting opinion. The only thing that is not tolerated is hate speech.

You even have the right to say that you prefer people don’t bring up religion, but I will make it clear that this is NOT the official policy of this website.

You know I am a Christian but I would have said the same thing to you if you tried to shut down someone who proclaimed that they found comfort in Wicca or Buddhism or Atheism. The paraphrase a famous quote : “I may disagree with what you say, but I will defend to the death your right to say it.”

Also, it is important to recognize that is is human nature for a great many people in the world to find comfort in their religion (whatever religion). BIID is suffering, and one of the main purposes of this website is to help all people find relief from the suffering of BIID. In that sense, religion is an appropriate topic for this website. Not everyone will get something out of such a discussion, and this will never be the major focus of this site, but it *is* a valid topic here.

EDIT: I started writing this before Sean posted his response but I’m sending mine anyway.

“Sure, it does go too far when the person tries to insist or push you to a place that you personally don’t want to go, but as a friend, it’s your job to talk to the friend and just say, “I don’t think that’s what I want for my life.” A true friend will understand and will back off and let you live the life that you are happy with. The key issue, just because someone tries to help you in your life doesn’t mean that they hate you or dislike everything about you, it just means that they care about you and want to help you be as happy as you can be and want to be in life.”

That makes me glad to know, Wheelman. Sometimes communication is not always easy with a friend.

“@Amanda, regarding people with disabilities being the most accepting group of people, I wish that was so in my experience, but I’m regularly surprised at how unnaccepting people with physical disabilities are of people who have mental/emotional conditions. :(”

I have had a few friends who have had emotional and mental conditions. I have always enjoyed “colorful” people and personalities. In the past, friends would come to me and talk about their problems.

Differences in other people inadvertently scare us. I have a fear of non-disabled people, so I try to befriend physically and disabled people and devotees and such. I feel more comfortable and happier.

“I once had a kitty who I dearly dearly loved, she was the closest thing I had in my life for a long while. One day I was using the bathroom getting ready for work, when I went in she was sitting outside the door just like any other day. I closed the door, did my thing…when I opened the door to come out, she learched like a frog at me with her claws drawn and began scratching the hell out of me. I retreated back into the bathroom and closed the door. She tore my hands and legs up with very deep scratchs. For the next three hours a I sat in my small bathroom while she tore at the door, hissing, and sticking her claws under the door trying to continue to attack me. Finally a friend came and we were able to catch her and contain her. As much as it hurt, I felt I had no choice after the circumstance to take her to the animal center and give her to them. I still miss her to this day and still wonder why she snapped the way she did. I’ve never seen something so addiment to attack their owner suddenly, nor something tear at a door so violently either.

-Wheelman”

I am sorry about your cat, Wheelman. Hopefully you will be able to get a new kitten after you move.

@Claire and Sean- Fine. Whatever.

We didn’t mean to upset you Tora. It’s called “freedom of speech” and I’m sure that you totally accept that. :o)

@Amanda. I am very glad that you can be our friend. Thank you.

Chloe, I am very glad you all can be my friend and accept me. That means a lot.

@Claire- It just annoys me a bit when people talk about Christianity as if it is the *only* belief that promotes love. I mean, the atheists I know IRL are MUCH more accepting and loving than the Christians I know. But maybe I’m making unfair judgments because my secret-but-not-really-secret-and-kinda-creepy-admirer is extremely Christian, as is most of my family (and some of them constantly rub it in my face which is annoying) and nearly all of my best friends are atheist.
And also I was in a bad mood because I hate going to church (my grandma made me go) and because I’m REALLY worried about Lexi.

Kinda appropriate to be having this discussion on this post, huh?

@Tora. I don’t think anybody here is trying to convert you or claim they have the “one true religion”. Intelligent Christians know full well that atheists are loving too.

The very vocal minority of “Christians” who espouse hatred, intolerance, and bigotry are NOT following the teachings of Jesus. I have plenty of Christian friends who are completely supportive of my lesbian relationship. I have plenty of atheist friends too.

I’m really sorry you are made to go to church. My parents felt it would be immoral for them to disclose their religious beliefs to me before I was 18. I thank them for that.

FWIW, I’m a pantheistic Buddhist.