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More Fun From The Wheelie Newbie
Written by Peter on Tuesday, July 7, 2009
This really has little to do with BIID but if you’re feeling like a little chuckle would do you good, read on…
I took my new-found toy (the Vision Barracuda Dream Machine) for another spin the other day. With the storyboard for my training and awareness film well under way, I found some new pitfalls that could inspire a follow-up movie.
In the past I have used those extra-wide, nice blue parking spaces at malls. As I mentioned before I have always wheeled outside from time to time to check that there are still plenty of other spaces available and that I’m not depriving others of these facilities.
Well the other day I thought twice as I’d read about a poor guy of 80 who got fined 400 odd dollars because he’d used his wife’s permit. She wasn’t with him, she’d died the week before. The irony of this is that he himself was eligible for a disabled badge but he hadn’t got one as they’d always gone everywhere together and there’s no point in hanging two on your rearview mirror. So if member of the Québec police is reading this (fat chance) you know what I think of you!
So, not taking any chances I parked in an ordinary space. This is a little embarassing because you get stares. People who are obviously thinking "Why is this man struggling in a narrow space when there are loads of available extra-wide blue spaces?"
Anyway we get over that and do the shopping - lots of shopping. So much so that frequent trips to the minivan are necessary as the weight in the bag slung over the seat back is getting dangerous. Unintentional wheelies are becoming frequent!
So out I go to the parking lot. "Oh!" No space to get in between the next vehicle and mine and open the door. "OK" thinks I, I’ll put the shopping in the back. I opened the rear door. It only gave me slight concussion as it swung upward and I put my shopping in. More stares. "Do you need a hand?" -"Stupid man" I think. I’m only loading a few stores in the back. Then I look up. The door is about 2 metres above my head! I refuse help feeling like a complete idiot. I spend some time pretending to arrange my shopping hoping the person will drive off. Then I hike myself onto one of the wheels and bust a gut trying to reach the door. Thank heaven it worked. I guess you learn by your mistakes.
The next story is advice to all wheelers. On one of my many entrances and exits at this mall I saw them! They were there waiting for their next victim. I had heard of these people but I hadn’t realized just how dangerous they were. The Do-Gooders. They were all there dressed in their official uniforms; black, sensible lace shoes, little woolly socks and tweed skirts. Their mission in life is to visibly "help" people. They were lined up in front of all the doors ready to open them. I suddenly found myself being pushed away from the door with the button to open it and toward another one. I protested and tried to explain that I can do this very well on my own and there is a push button and even if there wasn’t I have mastered doors.
More unwanted wheelies follow. As my chair does not have handles I get pushed on the shoulders, the castors leave the ground immediately. I shout, almost in anger. Wrong signal. Two more of these people rush over to "help". I am becoming more and more terrified. I protest again but all these ladies do is smile. What a nightmare. But they felt good after it. They’ve done their bit and will sleep better for it.
So, dear readers, if you ever see this gang at your mall. Do a U-turn immediately and wheel for your life in the other direction. If possible go into another store and hide in the toilet.
Peter
Tags: BIID, Wheelchair
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3 Comments
2 On 7 July, 2009, Sean said:
There’s always tying a rope to the bottom of the hatch door. When it’s open, you can grab the rope and pull the door within range.
Yes Sean, I thought of that just after I’d stupidly opened the rear door. We live and learn. Hopefully, it won’t be long before I can use a proper parking space.
We could all contribute to a book about wheeling - the do’s and don’ts. Sorry I’m always looking for ways of making money for this wonderful site.
Today’s visit to Three Rivers forges went very well but Parks Canada’s “Accessible to all” I found out means wheelchairs are OK as long as you have a very healthy assistant!
I really need a second,all-terrain chair. Anyone tried the new Crossfire?
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1 On 7 July, 2009, Chloe said:
I’d never heard about the do-gooder gangs. It sounds like a great premise for a horror movie from the perspective of a wheelchair user. All sorts of plot twists come to mind.
Yeah, I too learnt the hard way about being the right distance away when opening the rear door of the car! I always keep a crutch in the car, and find that it comes in very handy to reach the door to shut it. You gradually get more proficient at all this stuff.
It seems like a good proportion of us use a wheelchair to treat BIID. Consequently I think that any sharing of wheelchair experiences is relevant. So keep it coming, Peter. :o)