Blog > Thoughts > Other's Thoughts > Jolina's Thoughts > DAK Diaries – Part I
DAK Diaries – Part I
Written by Jolina on Thursday, September 18, 2008
My night was hell again – in a way. I was online, watching the Paralympics and partly chatting with different people until 8.45 a.m. Saturday morning. Me being awake again for over 30 hours was not due to nervousness. I think I broke through the wall of that somewhen between Thursday and Friday or Thursday during the day already. Since then I’m headed towards a weird kind of serenity. Unfortunately I am not quite at the point where I don’t care anymore.
One of my dearest male online-friends has cancer in both his lungs and liver. He is in a good hospital, together wiith his 3 kitties! Monday I got a package from him, with three lil boxes of Indian incense! I am dead worried about this friend because I love him very much. He is about 55 years old, half Pakistani, half german, has blue eyes and darkish skin, is very tall and muscular. At least I guess so because that is how he describes himself. Yesterday he said that he will pay me the flight ticket to where he lives (far east) when he will be well enough to get my visit. Today I asked him if this offer was meant seriously and he said yes! Then he told me about things I might like to do there, like swimming with dolphins, putting my feet in the warm water and lil fishes tickle my feet……I then asked him if he was aware that I will be legless by then. We then talked a bit about this topic. His opinion on my BIID is that he accepts my choice but does not approve of what I am going to do today in 10 days. I from my side do accept his point of view.
Then we chatted until he fell asleep for the night. Thank goodness his pain was bearable today and he has had a good day.
There are a few major things I realised while talking with my friend…..
For the first time in my life I know exactly what I really want, where I want my life to go, what I do NOT want. And also for the first time in my life I can actually see my future in bright colours. If my body will permit it, I want to take up some sport activities. I’m mostly interested in swimming, javelin, shot put and discus. All these disciplines are possible with two amputated legs. But I am a bit worried about my paralysed arm ,to be honest. But only future can tell. Maybe I will surprise myself…….
Tags: Amputated, Leg, Paralysed
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