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Pain Management
Written by Elisabeth on Friday, June 4, 2010
I ran into a friend of mine from my Sunday church. She was surprised seeing me wheeling and asked the dreaded why. I looked at her while rocking in a wheelie and said: I got too tired of the pain.
She didn’t ask much more after that, she seemed to understand, and we had a pleasant conversation about other things for another twenty minutes.
After wheeling for over half a year, I am so much more comfortable answering the why question. I often say that it is a bit complicated, that it is a combination of a few different thing. But sometimes the only answer that is needed is an explanation that I got too tired of pain. Nobody asks what kind of pain. People understand pain. We don’t want it. If a wheelchair helps me manage my pain, so be it. They get the understanding look. You know they are confronting their own suffering and if I add that the wheelchair enables me to enjoy my life more, they nod. People understand pain management.
I use a wheelchair because it helps me manage my pain. My physical pain and my psychological and emotional pain. It helps and that’s what counts. That’s why I am a wheeler. That’s the reason why I use a wheelchair now. It could change. It might stop helping and I would stop using it. Or the reason might become purely physiological. We might sometimes feel fake but we are not. I never pretend to be a para (not that there would be anything wrong with that). I don’t pretend it maybe because paraplegia is really not on the list of my body image. And I think personally not presenting myself as a para helps me not to feel fake. I use a wheelchair because I need to – for pain management. And most people will never argue with that.
Tags: BIID, pain management, Pretending, Wheelchair, wheeler
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12 Comments
You shouldn’t feel fake :)
I dont know what your body image is – But just think of it this way (And its honestly help me manage too :))
You may not physically have your body image – but it is still there, in a sense.
The easiest way for me to explain is – I may not be physically paralyzed. I may not be an L2 para … BUT I am -still- a para. My legs may work like that of an AB person, but that doesn’t change the fact that I -am- a Para.
One day I may be able to paralyze myself. But even so, Until then, I can still happily say that I am what I am. And that is a para …
Oops! I spoke too soon. I went on a very tough hike today, and now my back is hurting like crazy; far more than at any time this year.
Yeah, but thats to be expected isn’t it Chloe?
I dont have a really good chair for my computer. The back is straight up, and I have a tendency to lean forward anyways. So with the hours I spend on the computer, my back hurts like hell a lot XP
I went for a little walk yesterday. Tried to walk with a friend of mine in a place that is not accessible for me. Well, his back hurt so we had to do frequent stops. Which caused my back to hurt like hell. Obviously it was not a good idea. We’ll go back for a walk only to places where I can and will wheel. I got too used to benefits of wheeling. I like when my back is hurting me only little or none.
We seem to have a consensus that walking is silly. I couldn’t sleep on my left side last night because of the back pain. Also I was woken up several times by cramps (not spasms) in my left leg. The upside is that this morning it’s easier for me to walk with the leg brace than without it. :o)
I came across this site when a disabled friend posted a facebook link. As a moderate cp sufferer I cand oly walk short distances unassisted. I understad that biid is not somthing you do for fun but it reply is shamefull when you think walking is overrated you should appriciate how easy everything is for you while in an abstract way you are suffering mentally the truly disabled cope with that and a real and tangible physical imparment
11 On 13 June, 2010, Sophie said:
Thanks for your comments Tea, have you read any of the posts from some of us where we talk about our physical disabilities and how they impact on our lives? I’ve had to start taking blood pressure medication to stop my hands from shaking just so I can have a normal life. Many of us here do have an appreciation for the “able body”.
@Tea: I’m afraid you have it all backwards. Nothing is easy for us and our suffering is extremely concrete. I am truly disabled: I have a mental disability. I also have a physical impairment (back problems) that makes standing for more than two minutes very painful. The wheelchair enables me to live a better life, both mentally and physically. And you know what? My very good friend with CP totally understands.
That said, walking is over rated. Because it is considered the only normal and acceptable way to get around. The ADA has been around for twenty years and we still have that attitude? I treasure and cherish mobility. Thus I am a great advocate for accessibility. I have written a website about wheelchair accessibility of my town. I know ups and down of the “truly” disabled. Not only because I am their friend but because I am one of them.
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1 On 4 June, 2010, Chloe said:
That is also what I tell the majority of people who ask these days. I am actually astonished at the difference wheeling has made to my back pain. And I can truthfully tell people that my GP recommended I use a wheelchair for that very purpose.