Blog > Thoughts > Other's Thoughts > Elisabeth's thoughts > Just Being Normal…
Just Being Normal…
Written by Elisabeth on Sunday, August 1, 2010
The media presentation of people with disabilities is that of heroes, inspiration for others. The more I am spending time with PWDs, the more I see that being heroes and inspiration is generally not on their mind. All they want is to be accepted as equal. They want to be given the same chances at their shot for life. Most of them have no desire to be special, they want to be normal.
What I mean by normal is being treated as a human being, being seen first as a human being, as a friend, as a coworker, as a family member. They don’t want to be stared at. They don’t want to be helped when they don’t need it. They want to talk about their hobbies, their joys, their difficulties, they rarely want to talk about their impairment. That’s what I mean by normal. They will advocate for civil rights for people with disabilities but that’s usually the extent of their sharing about their own impairment.
It took me a while to understand that. When one comes from a devotee background, one has tendency to ask too many questions. One also buys into the heroic attitude a person with disability is believed to have. And then I understood that the attitude is the same as we people with BIID must have – you accept whatever your impairment or disorder is. You don’t overcome it (that is one of the myths of the able-bodied world that somehow we are overcoming our disability. What it really means to the ABs is that we are so normal that they don’t have to make any adjustment in their attitude or to the physical barriers). You adjust to it. You respect your limitations, yet you try to live to the fullest within them. You move on because the other choice – a miserable life or death – is not really a choice. ABs usually don’t understand that; many of them believe that one would be better off dead than disabled. I guess that is where the heroism comes to play. People are heroes because they don’t kill themselves (either physically or mentally). But when one gets into the situation, most people move on, most people want to live.
As people with disabilities we can show to the world that we are not heroes, that we are just trying to move on and be accepted as "normal", as equal. We can gently highlight the attitudinal and physical barriers but mainly what I am trying to show others is that I am the same as before, I am the same – wheelchair or not. Well, I am happier than before but deep down I am the same.
Tags: Disabilities, heroes, Impairment, Normal
This entry appears in Elisabeth's thoughts. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed.
You can skip to the end and leave a response. Pinging is currently not allowed.
5 Comments
Thank you Elisabeth, good stuff indeed.
It surprised me that being in a wheelchair makes me feel more normal. The more I wheel the more normal I feel. In fact, at this point I feel more normal than at any previous time in my life. Umm, seriously.
My impression is that the more normal I perceive myself to be, the more others see me first as a human being.
3 On 1 August, 2010, Sophie said:
Growing up when I had to go to school camps I was generally allowed in the kitchen to get access to my “special food” when none of the other kids were allowed to go in the kitchen. They used to be so jealous of me that I got special treatment and none of them ever seemed to understand that I would have traded it all in if it meant I could have gone to a camp and eaten the same thing everyone else did without any extra effort on the organisers’ part.
@Sophie: That hit a nerve. You reminded me of the teachers at school allowing me not to have a shower after sports, when it was compulsory for all the other kids.
5 On 5 August, 2010, Phil said:
For a child, being different just hurts.
There is no culture of real inclusion, of acceptance, of compassion, of love.
I try to be inclusive, accepting, compassionate and able and willing to love. It is difficult, because I am so much struggling with myself and caught in my own problem.
Post your comments
© transabled.org - 1994-2012 - All Rights Reserved.
1 On 31 July, 2010, Sean said:
Thanks Elisabeth, good stuff.
The other way the media represents people with disabilities is as vilains. Movies are FULL of baddies that have a disability…