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Sounds like you two are having fun. My straps are way too long too and I’ve considered trimming them, but I simply wondered if it would make it harder to pull them tight in some situations. Sounds like that’s not a problem for you.

Cute photos, btw. Nice two-tone brace leather, too.

I think I understand the AB/self-conscious problem, but I see it just slightly differently. Without any or minimal implements, walking isn’t easy. I know a good part of this is physical, but another part of it is some bit of mental support that is missing. I feel equal parts exposed & unprotected, and misrepresenting myself. With the braces or the chair, I feel absolutely, perfectly natural, but without them I feel unnerved. I am sure that this attracts attention.

This isn’t exactly the same thing, but I got my most recent KAFO in summer and I decided to use it right away with shorts - either alone, or in combination with my AFO, as I see fit. Shorts wouldn’t be appropriate at work, of course, but like you, I _feel_ perfectly natural wearing them out. I have a feeling that this comfort level causes other people to react in-kind and be at ease.

On the other hand, I can confess to one little devilish behavior. If I think someone is reacting inappropriately, I make it my personal quest to annoy them as much as possible - mostly by just being near them. I do this with my chair and my car too. For instance, I _love_ slowing down to a crawl when people tailgate me or honk at me when the lights turn green. It’ll probably get me shot some day, but I’m gonna have my fun up until then…

I trimmed my straps very early in my brace experience (15 years or so now), as soon as I was sure I knew how long they really had to be. I guess they come in a standard length.

@Lane I *think* I’ve spoken about this before. I feel much more at ease, more “me”, when I’m in my chair than out of it. Close friends who know about BIID have commented that I’m a different person in the chair. They thought I was putting on a show, because I’m so much more of an introvert outside the chair. But I’m more extroverted in the chair because I’m more comfortable with my own self.

@Sean. Yeah I am definitely more extroverted presenting as a PWD, because I feel SO much more comfortable as such.

@Lane. You do need a small amount of extra strap to pull on. Alicia got it just right. You can see in the pic if you look closely.

[Author's note: I often wonder if I should save some comments for posts because I'd like to flesh them out without the basic content being stale????]

@Sean Since starting full time (when away from the kids, as described elsewhere), I’ve noticed a shift toward extroversion. I alluded to this in a previous comment, but I’ve noticed that it’s actually exposing some pent-up slightly negative energy.

I was shopping in a large chain grocery store. Normally I do this off-hours to avoid other people as much as possible. This week, I went at a rush-hour and put myself and my chair in the thick of things. People were saying “sorry” and jumping out of the way for no good reason - clearly unnerved by the chair. It was taking all of my energy not to laugh out loud at the scene and attention. It only made me want to continue my shopping, while strategically choosing paths that would reproduce the nonsense. Without the chair, I would have almost run away. Even just typing this, I can barely believe the change. Is this still me we’re talking about???

This is quite long and probably belongs on its ow post, but bear with me here…

About two months ago, we had a mini heat wave here and it got to the point where wheeling with pants (my normal attire) wasn’t practical. I had shorts that I could wear, but was worried that my legs don’t look “paralyzed” or atrophied enough. I happen to own a pair of AFOs, and a few weeks prior, I saw a kid at a mall in a wheelchair wearing AFOs with somewhat “normal”-looking legs (maybe just as muscular as mine, if not slightly more) — and he didn’t look out of place at all.

So I went out in shorts while wearing AFO braces. I felt self-conscious, but it was mostly because of the different reactions I got.

Usually, people treat me like I’m a kid. Granted, I kind of look like a teenager despite being in my early- to mid-20s. But the reaction seems to be that I’m a young person with a physical disability who can still handle himself in a wheelchair.

With my AFOs on, people weren’t shying away from me more often than normal, but the reaction seems to be that I’m somehow “more disabled” (relatively speaking). This may sound like a logical and obvious reaction, and it probably is. I found that the curiosity in people’s faces that I normally see has disappeared, and they seemed to comprehend that I am “unable to walk” (which is ironic, because AFOs can have the opposite effect and help people walk).

It’s certainly an interesting situation, and marks the first and only time I’ve wheeled with braces and shorts on. I tried a similar experiment at school, where I used a walking stick for most days and a wheelchair on the occasional day. I wore the AFOs with pant legs that were shorter than usual, so they’d be visible and I’d be able to gauge the reactions of classmates. I usually get there well ahead of time, and get to chat with some classmates who only know me as disabled. They noticed the AFO but thought nothing of it. I asked later on and they just assumed that I wore them to keep my legs and feet aligned — but the key reaction that was prevalent was that they saw me as LESS disabled with them on, because they know the braces “help” me walk and that without them, I “wouldn’t be able” to walk at all, walking stick or not.

Just thought that was an interesting contrast.

^ A note: at school, I tried AFOs both with a walking stick and with a wheelchair. Same reaction. (Just never tried shorts.)

random thought i had while reading gordo’s comment- when i was younger, i always associated colourful plastic afos as a sign of a permanent disability because the only exposure to that sort of thing i ever got (as a kid) was the mentally and physically disabled kids at school who weren’t really in regular classes but everyone knew them anyway. they always had plastic ankle braces on and for a long time i didn’t realize that the brace was actually a brace and not just something that disabled people wore to show that they were disabled. i don’t know if anyone else had similar thoughts as a child, but if they did, that’s probably where that reaction came from.

that’s my two cents worth…

also sorry for the runon sentence… listening to velvet acid christ and drinking coffee seems to have been a bad combination. if you’ll excuse me, i need to go run up and down the stairs a few times to get rid of all this freaking ENERGY!!!!

(also sorry for the double post XP)

@Gordo & Tora. The sociology of disability is very interesting and complex; particularly the perceptions that ABs have about PWDs based on what they see. Thank you for those observations.

When this post was published I had no clue that I was going to be in a car wreck in a few days, and wheeling to work full time two weeks later.

Now, after six weeks of wheeling to work, the temperatures are still in the 90s(F). I’ve been wearing a variety of skirts, from ankle length to above knee. It is clear that when I’m in a wheelchair and the whole lower leg is visible, the brace gets a LOT more stares on average. Still can’t figure out the sociology of this!

In any case, none of it makes me the slightest bit self-conscious.

I think that you might get more stares with the brace and wheelchair combo because people ‘expect’ one or the other but not both. Also, subconsiously the general public think wheelchair users can’t walk at all. So if you so much as stand to reach something on a shelf you’d get loads of wierd looks. An extension of that is if you can’t walk then why would you need a brace.

Maybe I’m wrong with my guesswork there. Whether I am or not, well done for getting out there and improving your workmate’s perception of disability.

Chloe, I can’t remember, are you pretending total paralysis - I don’t think so. So it’s fine to use the combo. I’ve seen no less than 3 guys the past month with 1 KAFO and using a wheelchair.

@Beth & Peter: I’ve not hinted to folks at work that there is anything at all wrong with my right leg (which indeed there isn’t). Nevertheless, if I’m at a store I simply can’t bring myself to get out of the chair to reach something on a high shelf.

Are you wearing braces when you’re in the wheelchair, Peter?

I’m still trying to pick up courage to go out in a mini-skirt with my braces on. I’ve needed them pnly since last January. Their so ugly i dont think i can get in the car decently. Any suggestions please.?

Hi Gill. I’m not ignoring you. What you said inspired so much thought on my part that I couldn’t fit a reply into a comment. I’m responding in a separate post, coming shortly. Thank you!

Chloe, Yes I HAVE to wear both braces all the time and I just cannot get used to them. Every day,day in day out i never forget these girders of steel.I have difficulty getting in my small car as the shoes get caught in the door and the pedals. Is it better to just start living in a chair and forget the braces or just keep trying. I used to have long shapely legs but now I am embarrased to show them in anything short. Can you advise me about leaving and entering my car and dealing with the opposite sex. Thank you Gill.

Hi Gill,

I am so sorry you are having a hard time getting used to your braces. At first I felt very clumsy getting in and out of the car, shoes getting caught in the door and pedals as you say. One of my solutions was to adjust the seat every time I got in and out of the car. I kept the seat back for getting in and out of the car, and moved it forward for driving. I don’t do that any more, but I have an advantage of having relatively short legs and a medium size car. Long legs and a small car does indeed sound like a tricky combination with leg braces. Perhaps adjusting the seat would help for you, as it did with me. Another thing I learnt was not to rush things. Just take everything slowly, watching what you are doing, and things go more smoothly.

I’ve gradually got to where I’m comfortable with an above knee skirt, but I still feel I might get embarrassed with a mini-skirt. I now have the excuse of it not being Summer any more. However I think I might get there next Summer. I hope you read Art’s encouraging comments directed at you and me, under my post “Mini-Skirts and Braces” all about this subject. Some guys are pleased to see us in leg braces.

My boyfriend is taking me out to dinner tomorrow. He is completely comfortable around my braces. It really seems like it makes no difference to him at all one way or the other. There are indeed guys out there who see past such things, so there’s no reason to feel any less attractive on account of your braces. My boyfriend asks if he can help me put my braces on, or take them off, when appropriate. I let him help, even though I don’t need any, because I feel it demystifies them, makes them less scary, and it is a sweet act of intimacy.

My advice about dealing with the opposite sex (like I am some expert; ha ha!) is to simply be yourself. I know you said you never forget about your braces; but just forget about them. Focus on the interaction between you and the other person. If you are comfortable, it will make the other person feel comfortable. Don’t think about your braces; think about the other person and what they are saying. Think about who you are; you are a much more interesting person than just your braces. Eventually, after a guy has been showing interest in you for some time, he may (or may not) ask about your braces. It is up to you how much you wish to explain about that, but there is certainly no need to be embarrassed about it. I take it as a good sign that the question eventually gets asked. It means that the person is likely to be comfortable with your disability, and is not ignoring the elephant in the room.

The restaurant my boyfriend and I are going out to tomorrow has a big flight of stairs leading up to it. Not good in a wheelchair! For me this is one of the good reasons for having leg braces as an alternate mobility mode to the wheelchair. Okay, it’s not a piece of cake going up and down stairs in leg braces, and it took me a while to get the hang of it. However, it’s easier than a wheelchair. Also, if you need to get out of the car for a short errand, leg braces can be more convenient than a car to wheelchair transfer. Long distances are much quicker in a wheelchair though.

I’m afraid all I can offer is my own personal experience, but I hope some of it may be of help.

All best wishes to you, Gill. Please let us know how things work out for you.

~ Chloe

It’s that time of year again. Today I graduated to a mid thigh skirt, which exposes the lower thigh strap, but not the upper. Such things cause me absolutely no trepidation these days.