Comments on: Nor snow, nor ice, nor bitter cold… http://transabled.org/thoughts/nor-snow-nor-ice-nor-bitter-cold%e2%80%a6.htm Talking about Body Integrity Identity Disorder - Just another disability! Fri, 05 Sep 2008 12:25:52 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.5.1 By: Rachel http://transabled.org/thoughts/nor-snow-nor-ice-nor-bitter-cold%e2%80%a6.htm#comment-14762 Rachel Tue, 27 May 2008 20:40:40 +0000 http://transabled.org/uncategorized/nor-snow-nor-ice-nor-bitter-cold%e2%80%a6.htm#comment-14762 Your stories are of extreme interest to me. I'm awfully young to be interested in this, but I'm just glad that I'm not the only one with that kind of mindset. Your stories are of extreme interest to me. I’m awfully young to be interested in this, but I’m just glad that I’m not the only one with that kind of mindset.

]]> By: Claire http://transabled.org/thoughts/nor-snow-nor-ice-nor-bitter-cold%e2%80%a6.htm#comment-586 Claire Thu, 25 Jan 2007 10:35:25 +0000 http://transabled.org/uncategorized/nor-snow-nor-ice-nor-bitter-cold%e2%80%a6.htm#comment-586 Hi Ian - thanks for your kind comments, I very much appreciate them! Hello Mary - I\'m afraid it\'s not that simple. If BIID could be reduced to a simple need for attention, then it would be more easily resolved, wouldn\'t it? I already have a real disability (a light one, not mobility-related) that gets me attention that I could really do without. I\'d rather be in a wheelchair alone in a room than be able bodied and receiving all kinds of positive attention. In fact, I am rather shy and don\'t particularly like attention. And I have come to see that the kind of attention you get when you\'re in a wheelchair is the kind of attention you don\'t necessarily want. I get a deep peace just rolling along alone in my chair. Yes, other people can play a part; having someone else accept you for who you feel you\'re meant to be can be a wonderful feeling. That\'s where others come in, but it\'s not about \"attention.\" It\'s about fitting inside the body that your brain has always told you you\'re supposed to have. Hi Ian - thanks for your kind comments, I very much appreciate them!

Hello Mary - I\’m afraid it\’s not that simple. If BIID could be reduced to a simple need for attention, then it would be more easily resolved, wouldn\’t it? I already have a real disability (a light one, not mobility-related) that gets me attention that I could really do without. I\’d rather be in a wheelchair alone in a room than be able bodied and receiving all kinds of positive attention. In fact, I am rather shy and don\’t particularly like attention. And I have come to see that the kind of attention you get when you\’re in a wheelchair is the kind of attention you don\’t necessarily want. I get a deep peace just rolling along alone in my chair. Yes, other people can play a part; having someone else accept you for who you feel you\’re meant to be can be a wonderful feeling. That\’s where others come in, but it\’s not about \”attention.\” It\’s about fitting inside the body that your brain has always told you you\’re supposed to have.

]]> By: Mary http://transabled.org/thoughts/nor-snow-nor-ice-nor-bitter-cold%e2%80%a6.htm#comment-583 Mary Thu, 25 Jan 2007 06:19:15 +0000 http://transabled.org/uncategorized/nor-snow-nor-ice-nor-bitter-cold%e2%80%a6.htm#comment-583 Isn't the truth that you are desperately looking for this kind of embarrasing help, the attention from other? Like kind od a self-punishment for what you are doing...And isn't it obvious that you are disappointed if things like this won't happen, if the day is rather unenventful? Isn’t the truth that you are desperately looking for this kind of embarrasing help, the attention from other? Like kind od a self-punishment for what you are doing…And isn’t it obvious that you are disappointed if things like this won’t happen, if the day is rather unenventful?

]]> By: Ian Hughes http://transabled.org/thoughts/nor-snow-nor-ice-nor-bitter-cold%e2%80%a6.htm#comment-559 Ian Hughes Mon, 22 Jan 2007 20:17:13 +0000 http://transabled.org/uncategorized/nor-snow-nor-ice-nor-bitter-cold%e2%80%a6.htm#comment-559 You really are tremendous and your efforts are an inspiration to many. Keep at it, but don't forget to write it all up. You are doing what many of us only dream of. You really are tremendous and your efforts are an inspiration to many. Keep at it, but don’t forget to write it all up. You are doing what many of us only dream of.

]]> By: Claire http://transabled.org/thoughts/nor-snow-nor-ice-nor-bitter-cold%e2%80%a6.htm#comment-545 Claire Sat, 20 Jan 2007 13:52:51 +0000 http://transabled.org/uncategorized/nor-snow-nor-ice-nor-bitter-cold%e2%80%a6.htm#comment-545 Hey Jen, No, I couldn\'t have changed the tire, but I could have walked back to the hotel. I couldn\'t wheel back, in the snow. Had I a cell phone, I could have called AAA, except that my membership expired last month and I haven\'t renewed it yet! lol Those are all good questions. Can I imagine it...yes, I can **imagine**. I wouldn\'t really know until it happened, though, would I? The help being pushed on me...well honestly, I don\'t enjoy that, but it doesn\'t deter me from my desire. I don\'t live in an area where you\'re surrounded by strangers every time you go out. I live in a small town where everyone knows everyone and you always see the same people, and the bank teller greets you by name as you walk up to the window, and the supermarket checkout girl\'s daughter is in your son\'s class, etc. I think that people would get used to what I need help with and what I don\'t need help with, and get used to seeing me, unlike a situation like these pretending trips where I\'m always new. Similarly, the exhaustion, well, the pretending trips exhaust me because I\'m not used to wheeling, and I\'m out and about all day long, trying to cram experiences in. In my life at home, I work in my home office, and only leave the home once or twice a day for short periods. This is not to say that I wouldn\'t ever be exhausted as a para, but the pretending trips are quite different from my everyday life. This is what I\'m thinking, but who really knows? And frankly, I\'d put up with quite a bit of physical hardship in order to acheive some mental peace. Claire Hey Jen,

No, I couldn\’t have changed the tire, but I could have walked back to the hotel. I couldn\’t wheel back, in the snow. Had I a cell phone, I could have called AAA, except that my membership expired last month and I haven\’t renewed it yet! lol

Those are all good questions. Can I imagine it…yes, I can **imagine**. I wouldn\’t really know until it happened, though, would I?

The help being pushed on me…well honestly, I don\’t enjoy that, but it doesn\’t deter me from my desire. I don\’t live in an area where you\’re surrounded by strangers every time you go out. I live in a small town where everyone knows everyone and you always see the same people, and the bank teller greets you by name as you walk up to the window, and the supermarket checkout girl\’s daughter is in your son\’s class, etc. I think that people would get used to what I need help with and what I don\’t need help with, and get used to seeing me, unlike a situation like these pretending trips where I\’m always new.

Similarly, the exhaustion, well, the pretending trips exhaust me because I\’m not used to wheeling, and I\’m out and about all day long, trying to cram experiences in. In my life at home, I work in my home office, and only leave the home once or twice a day for short periods. This is not to say that I wouldn\’t ever be exhausted as a para, but the pretending trips are quite different from my everyday life.

This is what I\’m thinking, but who really knows? And frankly, I\’d put up with quite a bit of physical hardship in order to acheive some mental peace.

Claire

]]> By: jen http://transabled.org/thoughts/nor-snow-nor-ice-nor-bitter-cold%e2%80%a6.htm#comment-542 jen Fri, 19 Jan 2007 23:45:33 +0000 http://transabled.org/uncategorized/nor-snow-nor-ice-nor-bitter-cold%e2%80%a6.htm#comment-542 Claire, what if you had a flat tire AB? Could you have changed it? I couldn't. That's why I have an auto club membership. What did you think about help being relentlessly pushed on you like that? Can you imagine dealing with it every day of your life? Can you also imagine just spending some days in bed because the day before exhausted you to the bone? That's all part of life as a PWD, too, of course. I like my invisible life and it would bug me (at least at first) if I became not just occasionally visible but the most visible thing in the room every time I went out. Email me sometime. Wylz has my address. We'll chat if you like. Claire, what if you had a flat tire AB? Could you have changed it? I couldn’t. That’s why I have an auto club membership.

What did you think about help being relentlessly pushed on you like that? Can you imagine dealing with it every day of your life?

Can you also imagine just spending some days in bed because the day before exhausted you to the bone? That’s all part of life as a PWD, too, of course.

I like my invisible life and it would bug me (at least at first) if I became not just occasionally visible but the most visible thing in the room every time I went out.

Email me sometime. Wylz has my address. We’ll chat if you like.

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