by John - 9 September 2006
Like Sean, and at least a few other people, I have had a strong and long-term desire to become physically disabled; to use Sean’s term, I am "transabled". In my case I want to become a spinal cord paraplegic, something that I share with Sean. My interest in disabilities and my desire to become disabled dates back to childhood. It is impossible to honestly say when I felt interest in being paralyzed but I do remember being fascinated by the sight of someone with an amputation or in a wheelchair from very early childhood, say age 5 or 6. Certainly by adolescence I wanted to become physically disabled myself. Though the desire to be unable to walk and restricted to using a wheelchair has always been part of the picture, I have also had interests in other disabilities both in terms of being a devotee and wannabe. Still, the desire to be a paraplegic has been the strongest by far.
My Perspective continues »
by Sean - 4 September 2006
So in my previous post, I mention the fact that I felt rather scatter-brained today, and felt not quite in control. As I was driving on a quick errand, my mind wandered and I thought about "control". I am not, by far, a control freak. I enjoy being in control, but not obsessively, or anything over the top. Yet, there is certainly an interesting line of thinking between control and disability
Control and wheelchairs continues »
by Sean -
Today was a "therapy day". These sometimes bear fruit, sometimes not. Sometimes it’s not too obvious what the result was. Often I don’t even broach the topic of body identity integrity disorder. Usualy, I have an idea of what I want to explore, I’ve done my "homework" from the week before. Today was a beautiful spring day, and I definitely felt scatter-brained. I don’t like feeling that way, perhaps I feel I need to be more in control than scatter-brain allows. Among the many things discussed today was the fact that I don’t believe depression and BIID are all that closely related.
Depression vs. BIID continues »
by Jake D - 2 September 2006
On my latest visit to my psychiatrist, he described my condition of BIID as mono symptomatic Obssessive Compulsive Disorder. Is it even related to OCD at all? Consider this. If an amputee (not-by-choice) desired to have his/her original body form back and sought therapy for it, would the psychiatrist describe their condition as mono symptomatic OCD? I doubt it. My argument is that what I suffer from is simply my "state of being". It;s not OCD, its not paraphilia or anything else. It is just the "way I am".
Monosymptomatic OCD continues »
by Sean -
Someone asked me in a recent comment if I had "ever been on/tried medications such as anti-depressants or anti-anxiety medications?" The short answer to that is yes on both counts. The very long answer is strewn throughout the site. A search using only the word "therapy" brings out over 15 results. A search on "medication" also returns several results. Nonetheless, I’ll talk about it some more here, as it is an important issue.
Of therapy and drugs continues »